Good Morning World. I say this because I come to you in the wee hours of Monday morning after a wonderfully hot… tremendously sweaty…. gloriously oppressed weekend of being locked down in the unit. Ahhh the joys of prison life. You don’t think about how much other people’s behavior is going to directly impact your life behind these walls prior to move in day but let me tell you… like Will and Martin say in Bad Boys… “We ride together. We die together.” in here… for better or for worse. This past weekend… certainly for worse.
That all being said… let me at least tell you a short story that made me smile…
I call my boys on Friday afternoon… both of them started school on Thursday so they were very excited to tell me about their days… their teachers… the parking situation in the morning… the new friend they made but can’t remember his or her name… you know… standard elementary school happenings. I was thrilled to hear every detail. My youngest decides that he has had enough phone time and it was now time to set up his own version of the Indy 500 with his cars… “Okay buddy… have a good race!” and off he goes leaving my oldest son to talk.
“Daddy… guess what I bought?” he says the moment he gets the phone. “What did you buy bud?” I ask. “A smoke machine. And it is AWESOME. It blows so much smoke and I can put this little liquid in there and depending on how much I put in… more or less smoke comes out and I can put different liquid in there and depending on what type I put in… different color smoke comes out. And guess what I did with the machine?” he excitedly tells me. Huge smile already on my face… “what did you do with the machine?”… “Guess!” he commands of me… “Ummm… did you… put on a show?” I guess… knowing how much he likes to perform. “YES!! You want me to do it for you right now… I know you can’t see it but I will tell you what I am doing… okay here I go…” the exuberance and joy in his voice overwhelms me with happiness.
He proceeds to perform the song “Hot To Go” By Chappell Roan… “H.O.T.T.OOOOOO.GGGG.OOOO”…. making letters with his hands… fanning his face when he is “hot”… displaying such an outward portrayal of freedom… just being himself and wanting me to experience it all with him. It was incredible.
I remember at the beginning of this journey… being petrified that I would lose my connection to my boys… that we wouldn’t be able to nurture it and grow together. There wasn’t much else that consumed my thoughts. And although I still find myself having those worries when we don’t connect on one of our phone calls or I can’t talk to them for one reason or another… times like this let me know that we are in sync. That they know I love them… every part of them. And that even though I can’t see their “shows” or race their cars down the kitchen floor right now…. I am always here to listen and cheer… until I can once again be out there to enjoy them in person.
Okay… time to go make Nachos for the officers.
Stay Healthy. Stay Active. Stay H.O.T.T.OOOOO.GGGG.OOOO!