So… some “incidents” have taken place in my unit this past week and because of this… the powers that be decided to close our TV rooms “until further notice”. The guys are not happy about this… so there are now 100-150 dudes standing around… walking through the hallways… in not so great of moods… complaining and commiserated to no avail… which leads me to this blog which is basically just me… airing out some feelings that I keep to myself (for the most part) in here but most of them… I do believe could be relevant in the real world when faced with challenges just as much as they are in inside these walls…
Ok…I get it. Life isn’t fair or easy. A lot of us are doing something or living somewhere that we don’t want to be doing or don’t want to be living. We feel like we are “above” the tasks or situation that are coming our way or that we find ourselves in and that the world, or a judge, or the fates have sentenced us to live in a box we do not belong in. And when we feel this way… we show up every day (whatever “showing up” means for you) with a voice in our head that is screaming… “I DON’T WANT TO BE HERE!” And that infects everything about our lives…
Plain and simple… every minute that we spend feeling sorry for ourselves is another minute not getting better… another morning we miss a workout… another day wasted not being present with our family. Another day burned when we haven’t made any progress toward our dreams… our ambitions… our goals. Every minute that we spend feeling sorry for ourselves is another minute spent in the dungeon thinking about what we have lost or what opportunities have been snatched away from us or squandered… which all inevitably leads to the “great depression”. And when we feel depressed… we start to believe that nobody understand us or our plight… that nobody cares. That we are the only man or woman out here that is experiencing the sh*t life that we currently find ourselves in. Sometimes… the emotions we feel are a product of a horrible past… sometimes we just don’t want to get up at 5am and go to work but the world expects us to get up no matter what we have been through or what time it is…
Our feelings are costing us a ton of time because no matter how we feel… there is a “task” in front of us (whether literally or a journey to better ourselves) and that is all that matters in the present moment. And this present moment is ever all that actually matters. Yet…. too many of us let depression or regret hijack our lives. The truth is… one day we will all look back at whatever we are going through in this present moment and realize that it was never as bad as we thought it was… we may want people to feel sorry for us… to have sympathy for us but that sympathy won’t get us anywhere. Simply put… the only thing that will make us feel better and propel us forward is to get up… get dressed… and get busy.
We cannot get time back… so we have to be ‘minute hoarders’. I have found over the last year that the earlier I get up… the more I do. The less time that I stay in pity-party-feel-sorry-for-myself land… the stronger I become and the more daylight I see between me and my old self. When we learn to separate ourselves from our old ways by cultivating the values and priorities that lead us toward positivity and productivity… the “mountains” of adversity and hardship that we run into simply become speed bumps…making it easier for us to adapt to the road ahead and build the new life or sense of self that we crave and strive for…
When we learn to genuinely adapt… we begin to see everything that comes our way as a stepping stone on our progress toward that “future self”. But adapting to a new environment and new circumstances takes humility… especially in my case. I have found that humility is the antidote to self-pity. It keeps me rooted in reality and my emotions in check. Now… I am not saying that humility means that I am satisfied with my circumstances… because I am not. But I have learned to appreciate what I have and where I am… while staying hungry enough to learn everything that I possibly can for when I am on the other side of this thing. Humility is teaching me to harden my spine and encouraging me to stand tall… slowly becoming secure in myself no matter what anyone says or thinks… and that in itself has tremendous value.
Okay… end of rant.
Stay Healthy. Stay Active. STAY POSITIVE. STAY PRESENT. Make someone smile.
Go watch TV for me and the fellas 😉