I had the honor and priviledge of being invited to the graduation for the 31st DD-RDAP class this past week. DD-RDAP is the Dual-Diagnosis Residential Drug and Alcohol Program that T.I. runs (also just found out that T.I. is the only facility on the west coast that has this specific program outside of the “standard” RDAP program)… it is a 9-12 month intensive treatment program in which select qualified inmates live together in the same unit and participate in 3 hour treatment from 7:30 – 10:30am Monday through Friday. What sets this program apart from the standard RDAP program is that it is specifically catered to inmates that present a “dual diagnosis” outside of drug and alcohol abuse… this could stem from past trauma that led to mental health issues, PTSD, family abuse, sexual abuse and a number of other psychological issues that warrant more intense psychotherapeutic treatment.
Outside of actually being able to participate in the program and gain first hand experience… I have been extremely impressed with what I have heard about the process from other guys in here that I have spoke with regarding what goes on and the immense benefit that a lot of these guys get from the work that they put in. Now… that is the operative phrase… “the work that they put in”… because just like anything else that is worthwhile (especially related to mental health)… it takes the individual to put the effort forth in order to take full advantage of what the program has to offer. If guys go into the program with the notion of simply taking it to get time off their sentence or look good for a judge when going back into court for an appeal… they are not going to gain the long term benefits that the program has to offer. They aren’t allowing themselves to genuinely embrace the change that can come from digging in and opening themselves up to discovering their underlying issues… facing them head on… and learning tools to work through their individual pain and trauma that most likely had a hand in landing them behind these walls. To the contrary… the guys that are willing to embrace the work… to embrace the pain… to embrace the vulnerability and peel back the layers to uncover their truth in a safe and confidential environment… these are the guys that can really change their lives’ through this program and there was at least one of these guys that I was able to see graduate this past week.
I felt extremely lucky to be able to attend the event… mainly because it was the first time since I have been at T.I. that I was able to witness (first hand) a group of guys that have all experienced tremendous hardship in their lives… before and during their incarceration… being celebrated for working through that pain. For putting themselves and their loved ones first… for not succumbing to the social pressure that other guys in here put on them for expressing their vulnerability… for being steadfast and hellbent on bettering themselves because they know that it is up to them (and them alone) whether they want to leave this place a better version of themselves or just go back to the same old sh*t that they were doing prior. I was able to hear them speak… talk about the progress… discuss the program and the benefits of what they had been through over the past year and felt the hope for their future… which in turn gave me hope for my journey.
There is something beautiful and extremely special about watching a group of guys lift each other up from and through a dark place… the unique “brotherhood” that is formed through the sharing of stories… laughs… tears and triumphs. I am so happy for and proud of my friend that I was able to see graduate from the program. And I know… without a doubt… that the tools he has learned throughout the process will propel him toward a “successful” (whatever that specifically means for him) life outside these walls.
I want to leave you with a quote from the speech that my friend gave at the graduation…
“I was nervous… I was nervous of what I would have to do and frustrated by what I would have to feel… But there was no other way around it… I was going to have to uncover and rediscover things about myself that I did not want to feel. Plain and simple… I would have to embrace my vulnerability… and that was something that I didn’t feel prepared to do… But then… that all too familiar voice that I’ve been listening to for many years… popped into my head…telling me… “It’s not your fault, Alex…None of this is your fault. You’re doing the best you can with the cards you’ve been dealt”. Now, this is the voice that I’ve been listening to my entire adult life… “It’s not your fault” was my favorite cop-out line. It explained and justified my lot in life… and the bleak path I found myself in and saw in front of me. However… for some unknown reason when thinking about this program… another voice chimed in… “You’re right Alex… It’s not your fault that you were dealt a bad hand… But how long will you allow your past to hold you back before you finally take control of your future? In that moment… I knew that I had to kill the insecure part of me that didn’t allow me to show my vulnerability and force myself to fully embrace what this program has to offer… “
Stay Healthy. Stay Active. Make someone Smile.
P.S. – We got our TVs back so life is good 🙂