When thinking about what is going on in my world this week… for some reason I kept coming back to dreams. I love them. I have always had a fascination with dreaming and the possible meaning behind them. What makes us dream… why can we only remember bits and pieces (if any of our dreams)… what aspects of our current thoughts implant themselves as the main characters of our dreams? Everything about them really gets my juices flowing. And since I have been at T.I…. my dreams have been on another level.
I have vivid, movie quality dreams almost every night in here. They are not always “good” dreams per say but very rarely (if ever) are they the jump awake, sweating and scared type of dreams that we all dread. Most nights I dream about some mixture between the people and places in my life outside these walls with some aspect of life inside. I have had so many dreams about my boys and that feeling of waking up smiling as if I was just with them and then realizing that I am not actually there is such a strange emotional roller coaster of euphoria and sadness. But even outside of those… my dreams play out in such a crisp and concise way that when I wake up in the morning… I am absolutely amazed by the fact that it happened again. This thought is quickly followed by a question of why this is…
Although I have no real idea why I am able to dream so freely and clearly in here… I think one aspect of it is that I finally have the clarity of mind to allow for dreams to take place. I believe that we fill our lives with so many “things” and worries on a daily basis that we do not allow ourselves to mentally relax and “clean out” our brains enough for free flowing thought to take place and in turn free flowing dreams. I certainly did not allow for anything “free flowing” up there for many years and it is pretty crazy that prison has allowed and forced me to clear out the clutter but the result is extremely satisfying.
I know it is easier said than done but try to quiet that mental chatter a bit… let the small stuff go and really decipher if that “thing” you are so stressed out about is really the earth shattering decision that it seems to be in your worrisome state or could you take a step back… decide what needs to happen to fix the “problem” and strategically (and calmly) move in that direction. I would bet most of our stress can be eradicated by taking that step back… and with your new found mental clarity… who knows what your mind will dream up tonight.
Wishing all of you sweet dreams and peaceful nights.
Stay Active. Stay Healthy. (Both of which should help with these dreams as well 😉 )